Parshas Eikev - A Sanctuary of Kindness

Dear Friends,

I am grateful for the warm welcome I have received from so many of you, both in person at the Birmingham-Bloomfield Shul this past Shabbos, and via email. Thank you for introducing yourselves and for your good wishes! I am eager to get to know every one of you! If you haven’t yet had the chance, please say hello. (I can be contacted at jvalues@gmail.com). 

During the drasha this past Shabbos, we discussed a very important question. Answering this question is vital to each of us in our personal lives and to our shul’s mission. This is especially so, given how texting, tweeting, Facebooking etc. have altered the way we communicate, and ultimately, how we relate to each other.  People present at the drasha shared some terrific ideas. I’d like to present this question to all of you and invite you to share your thoughts as well. The question arose from the following story about Shlomo Hamelech’s construction of the Beis Hamikdash in Yerushalayim.

We are taught that when Shlomo Hamelech built the Beis Hamikdash he constructed an area where all the Jewish people would gather on Shabbos. There were two special entrances that led into this area. One was used exclusively by newlyweds and the other by mourners. When someone walked through the mourners’ entrance, the people gathered there would offer a few words of comfort. When someone walked through the newlyweds’ entrance, the people gathered there would express their congratulatory good wishes. We are told that Shlomo Hamelech created this program so that all of Israel would be kind to each other.

When we share a joyous or distressing experience we recently went though, and listen to others when they share the same, we open a piece of our heart and embrace the humanity of others. This also helps to build and strengthen our communal and congregational bonds. Perhaps more importantly, it evokes our inner goodness, and we become better and kinder people.

A shul is meant to be a mini-Beis Hamikdash, a mikdash me’at. It therefore behooves us to bring this beautiful legacy into our own shul and thereby into our own lives. In an age when we communicate with people, masked behind the various electronic media we use, a face-to-face sharing, listening and empathizing is vital to preserve and nurture our own inner goodness and sense of community!

The question we pondered during the drasha was, “How do we create an opportunity for us to share each other’s joys and sorrows within our congregational experience? How also can we adapt Shlomo Hamelech’s idea to our own environment?” Obviously, while being mindful of people’s time, “How do we incorporate our own version of Shlomo Hamelech’s idea into the Birmingham Bloomfield Shul, and what should our version of Shlomo Hamelech’s idea be?” Any thoughts?

We gave one idea a try this past Shabbos. At the delicious luncheon following the morning davening attendees were invited to share something, either fortunate or unfortunate, that they experienced during the week - while keeping it short. A number of people had something to share: whether it was about spending special time with a family member, a sudden and abrupt home relocation, the loss of two family members, the excitement of starting a new job, the distress felt upon visiting a prison, getting great reactions from a favorite t-shirt or gratitude for everyday blessings often taken for granted.

I am grateful to everyone for participating. Together, inspired by Shlomo Hamelech’s sanctuary of kindness, the Birmingham Bloomfield Shul aims to be a warm, friendly, and caring congregational community that practices kindness together. (We join this aim with our other goals of providing meaningful, uplifting, and understandable prayer services along with enjoyable, insightful and highly relevant Torah study sessions – including classes on Judaism’s guidelines for treating others with love, respect and consideration).

Please, dear friend, give some thought to this important question. Please share any thoughts you may have about how, with the Beis Hamikdash setting the standard, we can enhance the human connection amongst ourselves, build community and bring out the best in each of us.

Again, I would love to hear from you and if you haven’t yet had the chance, please do say hello. (I can be contacted at jvalues@gmail.com.) 

Gut Shabbos and Shabbat Shalom!

Rabbi Tzvi Muller